T.T

well, actually I did not mean to get angry like this. it's just that, events of this day makes me very disappointed with him!

in fact, he did not concern me. I'm confused I should be happy or sad?

but,certainly I feel very disappointed with him that seemed more concerned with his friend than me.

I know, I should not behave like this. but I'm just an ordinary person who wants to be noticed by others, including him. because he was someone special to me.
he's really a very ignorant and do not want to understand me.

I want him to change, I want him to be more concerned about me than the other. I want to be noticed by him. I feel very strange and annoyed with his character that seems don't care about me.

we never met face to face, although only small talk. we were like opposite and not permitted by the universe for the near future. I want him to know that I need him.

someone who could understand me and make me very comfortable.

but I think he's not that I want.

if I may be honest, I think I can not continue to survive. I want to be free and get all the attention that I want.

I don't know what should i do? stay or leave?
I have told him, that I have been bored on like this.

he promised to change. but what? not change that he gave, but still like this. flat and makes me sick.

like today, he offered me to pick me or not. it means,he wants to pick me up right?

but,as I wanted to ask him to pick me up, he was even more concerned about his friend.

he didn't know I'll come home alone. I don't have friend who can be invited to go home together.

he never understood that!

I was very disappointed and became lazy to get in related again with him. my mood have been lost by his own behavior.